How to Write a Eulogy for a Friend
Saying a Final Farewell to a Loved One

It is a privilege to be asked to write a eulogy for a friend.  It speaks volumes as to how close you were thought to be with the person.  That means that you probably feel pressure to write the perfect eulogy.  That is hard.  After all, what should you say about the person at the funeral?  Here are some tips to make your speech easier to write.

Make the Eulogy Personal

You were asked to do the eulogy for a reason.  You had a connection with the deceased that others did not.  Because of that connection, you probably have a story about them that sheds light on who they were in their soul.  Tell it as best you can.  If the story is a little bit humorous, all the better.  This is a dark time that could use a little levity, and everyone wants to be remembered fondly.  Just make sure the story gives some insight about the person.  Give your audience a tidbit of your friend’s personality that they can take away with them.

What Should a Eulogy Contain?

The eulogy you write for a friend should include:

A Brief Introduction

Of who you are and what your relation is to the deceased.

Something Personal

Whether that be a song, a poem, an interesting story from the deceased one’s life.  You should go with whatever feels right.

Lessons You Have Learned From the Person

A great way to honor the deceased is to mention what you have learned from the person.  A good lesson is something that is kept for a lifetime, so the deceased can live on through their actions.  This is a pleasant thought for family members on a tough day.

A Little Spontaneity

While having a eulogy written helps you express everything you want to and keep the speech on track, feel free to say something that isn’t on your index cards.  Sometimes there are just things you must say.

The Eulogy is Not Just About You

While the eulogy can be a kind of therapy for you, your eulogy for a friend will be will be read to friends and family of the deceased.  So make sure you

Make the Story Easy to Relate to

The story you tell must be something that the family understands and appreciates.  Stories of love, comfort and support are good examples of this.  A story about parties generally are not, even if you have fond memories of those times. Of course, use your knowledge of your friend’s family to decide what is good and what is not.

Make the Story Bring Back Fond Memories

This is not the time to point out any flaws your friend may have had.  Make sure the eulogy you write for your friend creates a positive image.  Try and pick a topic that you think the entire audience will not take offense to.

How Long Should the Eulogy Be?

A eulogy should be around 3 to four minutes.  While you can go longer, you don’t want to stretch out the speech for too long.  Help the deceased one’s friends and family members let them go and keep your speech short.

Writing a Eulogy Isn’t Easy

Eulogies are tricky to write.  There is nothing you can do about that.  You are not going to be at your best during the process, but if you prepare and keep in mind that this is as much for others as it is for you, you will be fine.  It is hard to know how to write a eulogy for a friend, but as long as you go with what is in your heart, it will be appreciated.

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